Kyle is the night engineer. He's dating the chick that hires all the shows at the hotel. She use to run Beauty Bar, LA. She books the DJs', he sets up the mixer and breaks down the speakers. It's an awesome combo. So, Kyle is usually here until the wee hours and tonight he's talking about all the weird stuff that he thinks is going on.
He lives in Joshua Tree so for the most part, it's right on track.
There are six different types of aliens. The one's we're most likely to see are the Tall Whites and I could actually get killed for telling you this. I hope you appreciate it. Anyhow, the tall whites like to do fun things like hang out and drink and go to Las Vegas and gamble and things like this. They kinda look like albinos and you've probably danced with one at a Hollywood night club.
They live underground in these giant cities that the government has built.
There are over 500 underground cities in the United States, one of the largest is just outside of 29 Palms and the Marine Base over there confirms it. They're obviously guarding something.
One of the entrances is off the Malibu coast. If you ask anyone that's lived in Malibu for a very long time, they will say that they have seen ships go in and out of the water. One thing they've forgotten to factor is the amount of drug use in Malibu and out of control partying. I'm sure people have seen all sorts of things in Malibu. Whatever. I start to grow skeptical after the Malibu stuff, but I roll with it.
Maybe we are alone in this Universe, I joke with Kyle. There might not be other intelligent life in the Universe. Maybe no-one made it past the nuclear phase of their development? A theory is that as civilizations grow over the years and they enter into new forms of living, Hunter & Gatherers to Stone Age to Bronze age to Iron Age to Industrial Age to Nuclear Age that nobody really get's out of the nuclear age. Civilizations always end up bombing the fuck out of each other and ruining the planets or moons they live on. So far, Earth has dodged the 1960s, but what is gonna happen when everyone has nuclear bombs? Somebody is gonna use one. That's the scary theory. Let's hope it doesn't happen. We've kept this civilization thing going 8K years this time around, let's hope we can graduate from the nuclear phase with no issues. Kyle dismisses it with the amount of stars, one has to have intelligent life. I kinda agree with him.
I ask Kyle why don't the Aliens intervene, and he says they are, JFK was an Alien. He was the last good alien. Now only the really bad ones intervene and it's ruining everything. If I ever see a 3 eyed man, I should kill him, he tells me.
Okay. I promise to kill all the three eyed men that I encounter.
Then Kyle shows me some You-tube videos. Lot's of talk. Somebodies kid was killed for knowing too much about the cities, but this one guy Charles Hall has a day pass. He can talk about all kinds of stuff, but nothing happens to him. Kyle explains this as some people are so highly regarded by the aliens, there is a list, a very short list, and Charles Hall is on it. He can do whatever he wants and nobody can kill him. No red list, blue list, CIA stuff for him. He get's the day pass, everyday.
Then he tells me there's no way to measure time. I ask him about the speed of light and he says it isn't a constant. I tell him the universe is 4 billion years old and he laughs and says we can't even be sure what's in our solar system. There could be another couple earths on parallel tracks in bubble universes that have bizarre different outcomes. He tells me about how maybe the Universe is just a big animal, looking for another universe to fuck to have a universe baby.
I have to check someone in.
Kyle lingers and looks up more videos as he waits to indoctrinate me more.
I check Ms. Fancybottom in and head outside for a cigarette. Kyle borrows a smoke from me and tells me that the majority of the Aliens are only using the Earth for a way point on their travels thru space. The Earth is a roadside diner for aliens.
The lizards are the worst. IF I ever see a Lizard man or woman or child, I should kill it. Then go on the run because Cheney is the chief Lizard and he hunts down all lizard killers personally. He shoots you in the face and eats your heart.
"So, good luck with the info, It's 2:30am I've got to leave." Kyle says.
"Thanks Kyle, I'll remember to kill 3 eyed people and lizard people and stay off the red list." I say
Kyle get's in his subcompact and drives the 45 minutes back up to Joshua Tree. It's probably more like an hour because he lives off Old Woman Springs Road.
I wave and then get to the paperwork.