Ski Dazzle

Razzle Dazzle. Guess whats happening at the LA Convention Center until whenever they stop.

SKI DAZZLE.

Come on down and pick up some cheap Rossignols. I havn't been skiing in so long. You can also get some cool snowboard stuff here as well. Razzle Dazzle and remember, you won't see specials like this until next summer, when ski season is over.

Ozzy Osbourne brings the foul weather

with Rob Zombie. Book a room here at the dirty hot hotel and then walk down the street to the venue. It's not too far. catch a cab if you wanna be an asshole about it. Come on. Even if you didn't fall in love with him from his TV show. You gotta love the whole black sabbath thing. Get on the Crazy Train and take it down to Seven St. Metro. and get off. It's a $1.25 on the honor system to take the Crazy train. The Staples center is about a 10 minute walk from the Crazy train depot.

I just clocked tickets off stage right for $100 bucks. You'll love it.

As for whats happening outside? It's raining! I can't believe it. Try to find something fun to do in the rain. Look out your hotel room window and count the number of car accidents. Is that really water?! It is water. Alright! Call in sick and enjoy the day off. The first rain of the season is here.

Leave it to Ozzy to bring some rain. Oh yea! Ozzy bringing the rain. Check back for further updates on storms and massive tours coming to your area. Looks like it could rain all day. So break out that rain jacket and break out that umbrella and get out there. Shit, you're only 2 hours late for work, and don't forget Ozzy starts at 8pm.

Murakami at Geffen MOCA

Free from

5pm

till

8pm

Here's an interesting art show. Super Japanese art mixed with retail in this mad mad mad world that we live in; Louis Vutton has added special handbags to this artshow. Are you kidding me? Thankyou Murakami for breezing thru LA. The show runs till whenever, I want to say February something or another. Find out yourself! Google something else besides porn and get things moving up and down your art chakra. Oh, is that a Twenty? Thanks. The show runs till Feb. 11th. Like I'll be reminding you later, it's free every thursday from 5 until 8. Of course your not taking the car, you're staying at this Dirty Hot Hotel, and so now you can spend a couple bucks for a sushi roll in the Fun Ninja market down in the Japanese village.

Get out more often. Ditch your car and take the Train downtown. Pershing square station is central to everything. Wear some walking shoes, cuz you'll probably even be running at one point, but whatever. You love it down here. Lets face it. You could use some fitness there you little fatty.

Come on down to the Murakami exhibit at Geffen MOCA in Little Tokyo today, it's free from 5pm to 8pm. It's like that every Thursday.

Big Thursday - Nov 29th.

So you've got cuckoo crow at the redcat
You've got La Boheme at the LA Opera
You've also got the Lakers vs. the Nuggets at the Staples Center.


Redcat is $20
La Boheme is $185 for Founders Circle balcony
Lakers is running $230 for 4 rows behind Nuggets bench.


Call me. Let me know what you want to do. Just pick up the phone and dial concierge.
Whats that? You're not staying at the hotel? Well then. Come on down. We're the dirtiest and the hottest hotel Downtown. Rooms start at $225.

Seattle Kids invade the Red Cat

Wanna get a jump start on your Thursday? Wanna see some Seattle Kids get all wierd in the Redcat tomorrow? Then clear your schedule of all that bullshit and

Click here and buy tickets.

http://www.redcat.org/

redcat.org

see which one works better. The latter has more asthetics but is worthless. Any who, these Seattle Kids are all about the experience and half of them are staying with us here, at the Dirty Hot Hotel. You are gonna love it here. Have you figured out where I am yet?

I'm not going to spell it out.
Figure it out. Do a word puzzle every once in a while, you asshole.

So yea, Seattle days at the Redcat start TOMORROW till Dec. 2nd. Get it while you can can. Tickets are $20 for the first couple dates and then go to $25 for the last 2 dates. If you're a Cal Arts student it only costs $10. There is a kick ass article here: http://www.downtownlascene.com/index.php/scene/news_item/26858/

As for today, why don't you just start drinking and take that dog out for a walk!! You'll figure something out.

Mucho Wednesday

Go to la Cita.
Enjoy yourself with Mucho Wednesday. The fun probably starts around 9pm.

MW.

I don't know what to do today. Maybe go shopping at ralphs. They've got some bargains but you have to shop for them. Buy some of the big items from the bachelor dept. 10 lbs of lasagna. Stuff like that. 400 Taquitos. Good luck dragging all that stuff home. You should have borrowed your friends car and then it wouldn't have been that big of a deal.

During the day today...hmmmmmmmmmm. Well it's shitty weather, so why don't you just stay inside and practice your Italian lessons. Maybe pick up some sheet music so you can play that keyboard you bought. They've got a lot of sheet music at DJ STEREOLAND DJ.

Welcome to the nightclub at the Dirty Hot Hotel - Pulse

You are gonna love these girls.
They love it here at the Dirty Hot Hotel.
We've shipped in about a dozen and they are all set for some action.

Don Giovani at the LA opera

What are you doing today? Did you get all coked out last night with some new girl and she forgot to put your name on the room. What happened? Why don't you know her last name? Why didn't you have her put your name on the room. You know we can't let you go up to that room. Your lucky we havn't called the police on you. Just relax. Wait for her to wake up and then you can get all coked out again and have more sex. Why don't you go up to the pool and just hang out for a little while.

Today you are going to the Opera.

Don Giovanni from Wolfgang Mozart Amadeus

"Don Juan's back and LA Opera's got him! The sexy and sensual Erwin Schrott returns as opera's greatest Lothario in the ravishing production that won LA Opera kudos in 2003. The Los Angeles Times commented: "The eye is startled, delighted, and sometimes enlightened by constant visual stimulation."
Mozart's great comic drama not only catalogs the Don's conquests (2,065 women, to be exact), but also deftly unfolds an intriguing series of escalating calamities that ensue as those he seduced and abandoned seek their revenge against him. And when the Don disdainfully invites a vengeful ghost to dinner, all hell breaks loose." - LA opera homepage

Sunset check in specials

Get in the car. Come on down to the Dirty Hot Hotel and check in. Rooms are discounted because we're low occupancy. You're gonna love it here. Bring your animals, bring you vices and bring your pleasure chest. We've got enough room for everything here at the Dirty Hot Hotel.
What is there to do today?
Well. Nothing.
The Clippers are playing somebody at the Staples Center, but let's face it, you're a Lakers fan and you're not giving up yet. You are gonna stick with Kobe until they win another championship. Is it gonna happen this year? Probably not, but you're not going anywhere. So yea, there's that and Mustache Mondays at Crash Mansion LA and nothing else to do.

Take your lovely lady of the night out during the day and buy her some jewels in the jewelry district. She does so much for you and all you do is buy her food and drinks. Get her something nice. Hell, buy her some flowers too.

Fresh Hungarian Girls

Forget everything you ever wanted to know about Eastern Europe. The Hungarians have arrived. Oh they are worth every penny. Who wants to go on a Asian Sex Tour when you can just come on down to the Dirty Hot Hotel and get yourself a nice Hungarian girl.

The Standard New York

It's being built right now. Meatpacking district here we come. Look out New York. Oh I'm so going to transfer in 2010 to the NY Standard. Doesn't it look nice. They are doing a blockbuster job in building it. Below is what it will look like when it's finished.
Long live Andre Balazs.

Late check out?

Sunday football - Redskins vs Buccaneers

It's all or nothing these days with the Redskins.
Maybe your team is at a crossroads as well.
I need my team to win the rest of it's games.

Wake up early today and start wandering the streets. Make it over to Caseys Irish Bar and Grill for the game. They have that NFL satellite, so you can have them tune in to any game that you want to watch. You can also drink yourself silly.

Order some bangers and mash while your watching your teams fate.
What else can you do today:

Lakers are playing the New Jersey Nets at the Staples center at 6:30. I just clocked some tickets for around $230 bucks, thru ticketmaster. Not quite center court but close enough. Section 102.

Stop smoking drugs for 5 minutes and go out side and enjoy yourself.

Bikinis' at the pool

Hello there.

Heading to the pool? Yes, we have towels at the pool and yes, you look gorgeous. Do you have time to make out in the storage closet for a couple minutes? No?Whatever.

We still love you here at the Dirty Hot Hotel. It's so good to see you, and we hope to be seeing so much more of you.

Shooting pool at the Dirty Hot Hotel

This is Jenna.

She works at the Dirty Hot Hotel.

She can do wonders with your chakras.

So come on downtown and live it up.

Be dirty.

Get all hot and bothered.

The Girls of Dirty Hot Hotel

Hi Girls!!

Look over here girls.

Over here!!! I don't know which I like more.

The blonde.

The redhead.

or the Brunette.

Oh I like them all. So should you. It's a rip roaring good time here at the Dirty Hot Hotel.

The Paramedics are here.

Is that Edina? OMG it's Patsy!!

Hey gang!!

You're not living if you've not met these women. Hell, you're not living unless you are one of these women.

Ohhhh the good old days!! Stay inside today and watch all the episodes of AbFab that you can.

AbFab checklist.

cigarettes - check

vodka - check

coke - check

pot - check

whiskey - check

If the paramedics aren't for you. Your in luck. Count your lucky stars that you didn't overdose and then think about what you're going to do tonight. Lay off the pills. There are 2 big events going on downtown tonight. The Clippers are playing the Hornets at the Staples center at 7:30.

Right next door at the Nokia center is La Quinta Estacion staring all your favorite latino pop bands. I really don't know anything about it, but Aleks Syntek, Belanova, Reik and Moenia will be there. Tickets are sold out.

Cicada restaurant - Olive and 6th

Doesn't this look nice? It's Cicada restaurant on Olive and 6th. The place is kick ass. The wine list is kick ass and ask for their selection of desert wines. Order some Grappa. If you really want the northern Italian experience order some Jacopo Grappa and have the 5 course meal for $85. You're gonna love it. You're boyfriend or girlfriend is gonna love it too. It's built in this old department store/habidashery. I don't know if you can sit on the upper level, we asked but they said no. It must be for overflow or something. Whatever. Get all dressed up in your finest Italian clothes and come out to play downtown. Afterwards you can wander over to Pershing Square and watch all the downtowners on the ice rink.

Don't laugh.

It's no Rockafeller plaza, but it's all we got here in Downtown, so you better enjoy it.

John Fogerty at Nokia

Tonight: One night only.

Jon Fogerty at the Nokia center.

I just clocked some tickets for $55 bucks plus that damn $10 convenience charge.

Aching for the CCR to make a comeback?!? Well, you gotta take what you can get.

Bring your lighters and get ready for some smooth rock-n-roll. The old man is literally down the road if you stay at the Dirty Hot Hotel. Book a room for around $165 and walk down the street to the Nokia center.

The Brawl

Boxing Downtown at the Staples Center: Mayorga vs Vargas then Welter Wieght Title bout w/ Cintron vs Feliciano. I just clocked some tickets for $300 bucks on the floor.

Here's what you have in store.

"Former world champions Ricardo Mayorga and Fernando Vargas will try to prove they still matter while reigning champion Kermit Cintron will attempt to defend his title in a boxing double feature here Friday.
Tough-talking Nicaraguan Mayorga, 28-6 with one draw and 22 knockouts, will face equally outspoken US veteran Vargas, 26-4 with 22 knockouts, at a catch-weight that pushed the fight into a super middleweight level.
"Vargas is too fat to keep up with me," Mayorga said. "Vargas is done as a fighter. He was great when he was in his prime, but he doesn't have anything left. He has taken too many shots."

Vargas, who turns 30 next month, says this will be his final fight and that he will win in six rounds or less. He has fired back early and often in the war of words.
"I don't like anything about Mayorga," Vargas said. "He has a face only a mother gorilla would love. He's a jackass. I'm going to beat the (hell) out of him. He has a big mouth. He doesn't think about what he says. He just spews things.
"Mayorga talks a big game, but he's scared. I'm going to make him look stupid and finally shut him up Friday. The only thing I'm going to leave in the ring is Mayorga's blood."
Puerto Rico's Cintron, 28-1 with 26 knockouts, makes his second defense of the International Boxing Federation welterweight crown against American Jesse Feliciano, 15-5 with three drawn and eight knockouts.
Cintron is looking at unbeaten US fighter Paul Williams in February if he keeps the crown, but big-money paydays against unbeaten rival champions Floyd Mayweather and Miguel Cotto are unlikely any time soon.
Mayweather is fighting England's unbeaten Ricky Hatton in two weeks while Cotto is a possible foe for the winner or even Oscar de la Hoya, who is looking at a May 3 bout, possibly here at Dodger Stadium.
Vargas was to have fought Mayorga in September but the fight was delayed because Vargas was ill.
Vargas lost twice last year to Shane Mosley, being stopped in the sixth and 10th rounds, while Mayorga's only fight in the past 27 months came 18 months ago when he was stopped in the sixth round by de la Hoya." - yahoo sports.

Also - from about 8pm to 10pm at the Pershing square ice rink, you can have the pleasure of seeing the world famous Pretenders cover band "Pretentious" perform all your favorite Pretenders songs.

Hookers for the Holidays?

So you're lonely?!

You're also all alone in this big city for the Holidays and you need a friend.

Why not buy one?

We've got plenty of girls for you at the Dirty Hot Hotel.
They come in all sizes and shapes and you should really order a couple and make a party out of it. Who cares if they don't look like the picture in the back of those magazines. They're still people and they'll sit around all day and talk to you if you pay them enough.

Enjoy life my peeps, cuz you only get one shot at it. So you want to talk about hookers? Lets talk about the high priced call girls that swing by the Dirty Hot Hotel. They're the ones you call in the back of those magazines. You might not get the girl in the picture, but you'll get a warm body. Usually, you turn them away because you're afraid of yourself. They always come by the desk and want their parking validated. That's when I get to see them. I never see them looking good; on the way in. Sometimes I do.

Hot Babes at the Beach

What else it there to do on Thanksgiving?

Escape downtown. Take the express bus down Wilshire Blvd all the way to the Beach and take as many pictures of hot young ass.

Happy Thanksgiving

What are you going to do today?
Eat turkey and smoke pot?

Well.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Don't forget to say a prayer for all those dead Indians.
Starbucks on 6th and Grand is open until 3pm. Other than that, there's nothing open downtown.

You can also stop by The Standard hotel and have a turkey dinner with all the dressings for around $40.

Call your Mother.

So you think you can dance?

Yea you do. We all do. You thought you could even get on the TV show but you didn't. Now you'll be a waiter for the rest of your life. Oh yea, and Vegas keeps calling; but Vegas will take anything.

Wanna go see what you missed out on.

Get over to the staples center and enjoy the show.

Van Halen at the Staples Center

Get the fuck out of here!!!

Van Halen with David Lee Roth and Eddie and Eddies 14 year old son on Bass!!! You've gotta be kidding me.

Just clocked tickets in the nosebleed section for $50 bucks plus that damn surcharge.

Get it and love it and sing "Jump" all the way to your seats.

Monday morning blues

Good Monday!

What r u going to do today? Well. Come on down to the Dirty Hot Hotel and get a room. The prices are discounted cuz nobody really stays with us during the holiday season. More than half of our rooms are empty. Rent the penthouse for pennies, and then buy some gold paint and paint your girlfriend or boyfriend and then have sex. You're fucking golden!!

Then do yourself a favor and stop taking drugs. It's the holiday season. You've got to get ready to see the family this Thursday. Flush all your drugs down the toilet and drink some orange juice for once. Stop believing everything you read on wikipedia and go downstairs and talk to the head valet. He knows more about living than anybody. Then tip him handsomely.

Take a shower and wash off some of that alcohol binge you've been on. Rent a good movie and call your mother for once. You know she loves you.

Start a band Saturday

Have you been ice skating yet? Go ice skating in Pershing Square.

Then head down to 6th and Spring and buy a keyboard at the DJ Stereoline DJ shop, don't ask for an address, you don't need an address! It's right on the corner! Don't be afraid to get lost, people are nicer than you think when you ask for directions. Remember that band that you were going to start. Get some simple melodies down. Don't hurt yourself. Don't buy any sheet music. All that music is inside you. You're also gonna wanna pick up a wig and figure out a way to sneak into the AMA's tomorrow and see Duran Duran.
As for the band name, don't even think of one yet. Wait till your first gig and everyone is shit faced drunk. This is when you'll find the perfect name.

Record broken again

The roof top manager blew the all time record, again, for using 'Daddy' in a sentence.
Sources close to The roof top manager say: he used it as a verb, noun, adjective and then went into a pronoun that blew the roof up.
"I counted this time and it's 34 times" An employee, who refuses to be named because of her recently signed confidentiality agreement, was in tears of joy.

Kings Vs. Ducks

Oh yea! Big Thursday. You've survived it all another day.

Come over to the hotel and give us some money. Tip everyone you meet. Walk into the back kitchen and tip all the people behind the scenes. That fry cook will spend the money on his family as your server will probably spend it on coke. Whatever. You make the call.

Head over to Pershing square where you can ice skate. Today is the opening ceremonies. I don't know when they start, read the paper for once you asshole. Okay, I'll tell you, cuz you tipped me:

HOURS OF OPERATION/ADMISSION: One hour session: $6 Skate rental: $2
*General schedule: Monday -Thursday 12:00noon - 9:00p.m. Fri/Sat/Sun 10:00a.m. - 10:00p.m.
*Monday–Sunday Special Extended Holiday Vacation Hours 10:00a.m. – 10:00p.m. (Dec.– Jan.)
*Open every day: special hours apply on Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, MLK Day

Tip the ice ring master for no reason, and see what happens. Money opens strange doors.

After spending most of your money. Head on down to the staples center to catch some hockey. Bring a jacket cuz there's a big chunk of ice. Game starts at 7:30. There are no tickets via Ticketmaster and if you'd think about the future for 2 seconds, then you'd be alright, but now you have to buy them at a premium on the street. Scalpers. Wanna go to jail? Fuck it, you've never been to that nightclub. No drinks, but free appetizers. Think about it. The management knows where the scalpers are. All you have to do is buy it, then everyone goes to jail. They've got cameras everywhere, but you don't care, everyone does it and you're 1 bottle down the road anyways.

Moby at Elevate lounge

You're probably going to have to get table service to get into this event. Unless you've got $30 or you're me, or you know people.

Moby doing a DJ set at ELEVATE LOUNGE.

remember the last time we saw him live in '94 and we were at Monster Massive and it was Halloween and I was a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle??!? Remember how he came on and everyone went ape shit and i lost my turtle shell.

That was fun. Hopefully tonight will be the same.
Get there early if you want to get in.

Tuesday action - what is afterall 16?

Get up late. Spend the morning at your rooftop pool and decide what you really want to do with your life today.

I'm going to start writing that non-fiction hotel book.

Abuse a little bit of whatever you want to get the juices flowing and then go crazy. Write about, or Design or film or record whatever comes into your head. Then use the Hemingway method and keep a little bit in that well for tomorrow.

After your finished, you should head out to the Central Library and read a book for crying out loud. Then later tonight you can catch a reading from the ALOUD series.

Tue, Nov 13, 7 PM
Gregory Rodriguez
Mongrels, Bastards, Orphans & Vagabonds: Mexican Immigration and the Future of Race in America
In conversation with Karen Grigsby Bates, NPR correspondent
The iconoclastic Los Angeles Times columnist discusses how the mestizo legacy of Mexican-Americans, the largest immigrant group in the country's history, will forever change how Americans think about race and ethnicity.

if that doesn't strike you. Then load up that pipe again and think about this for tonight:

Ulrike OttingerMadame X: An Absolute Ruler 7:45 at the Redcat Theater.

It's underneath the Walt Disney Concert Hall.

To celebrate the launch of Afterall 16, please join us for a screening of German filmmaker Ulrike Ottinger’s first feature film, Madame X: An Absolute Ruler.
In this cult feminist pirate film, the harsh beauty Madame X calls upon women to trade their comfortable but dull lives for a world of danger and adventure on the China seas. Among those that gather aboard her ship, Orlando, are a housewife, a diva, a psychologist, a "native" beauty, and an artist (played by Yvonne Rainer). Fueled by discontent, their utopia unravels as they begin to ritualize the power games of the outside world.
Afterall is a non-profit research and publishing organization co-supported by Central Saint Martins College of Art and Design, London and California Institute of the Arts, Los Angeles that publishes a contemporary art journal and a series of books. Afterall 16 features texts on artists Yto Barrada, Gillian Carnegie, Ulrike Ottinger, and Christopher Williams, with introductory essays by Jeff Wall and Anthony Huberman.

Clive Barker signed books?!?

You missed the opening on Nov. 8th but still. Get down to Bert Green Fine Art at 102 West 5th Street. They are having a Clive Barker exhibition from Nov. 8th to Dec. 29th. Maybe an exhibition isn't the right word. They have new paintings and work on paper from Cliver Barker. Then walk your happy little ass down to Metropolis books and buy a couple signed copies of his books.

Stop somewhere and get a drink inbetween.

Going on strike.

Yea!! Whoo whoo.

Yea, you're on strike!!! Even if you're not, they're pretty cool and they'll let you pick up a sign and scream at the production across the street.

Today?!? Besides being on strike, you've decided to meet your lover in little tokyo and then fuck all day in the Otani.

Have fun.

SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY - Redskins vs. Eagles

Go Redskins!! Watch out for that Eagle!? How could you blow that 4th quarter lead?

After the loss, you should really drown your troubles. Does Joe Gibbs know that a football game lasts 4 quarters? Who knows, but it's all or nothing against the Cowboys next week.

Elevate lounge

Saturday fun?!!? What is there to do tonight? Buy some whiskey and hide in your loft. Go use your gym. You paid $550K for that thing. Enjoy it. Spend some time on the garden on your balcony and buy some more air cleaners. What are you doing? You're surrounded by freeways. Why on gods earth did you buy a loft in Downtown Los Angeles. You should have bought something in Long Beach. Didn't anyone tell you they are turning Long Beach into the new Playa Vista.

Oh Well. Watch the USC game on ESPN and hope they beat California State. You should stay in all day and examine your investment strategy. I'm gonna buy a condo for half price from your neighbor and then rent it out to musicians.

Whatever. Think about Long Beach and and then go out later to some rooftop bar club. Try Elevate lounge, get table service; blow some of that trust fund you rich bastard. The dance floor rocks. I'm going to some sub-basement club.

Lakers Vs. Timberwolves

Are you kidding you've got nothing to do tonight. First the lakers vs. timberwolves at the staples center at 7:30. Get into the shower right now. Take that beer with you. Don't forget to wash your hair with a little. Then take that fucking dog out for a walk.

Gossip and revel in your foes blunders.
Then send flowers.

Lock the dog back up in his 3000 sq. ft. dungeon and out you go. 7 Grand opens at 4pm and you should really chase that beer with a whiskey. Then make your way to Cliftons, I mean who do you really think you are, and get some cafeteria food. Fucking preppys.

After the game you should go to the Wiltern to check out MIA
You should have bought tickets already. Maybe you could check them out at the Seattle show. There are tickets on EBay for $159 for 2. If no tickets, don't fear, you can just hang outside and start an outside concert culture. Go to the events, but don't go inside and just hang out and pass out fliers and make some goo balls and buy a van and blast trance music from some speakers built into the mural on the side. Then drive over to the Orpheum theater to mess around outside while Ben Harper plays inside.

Turkey in November?!?

Fuck it! I just clocked a round trip to Istanbul, historically Byzantium then later Constantinople, Turkey for $1486 including taxes and fees. That does not include my tip. Ahem. You leave tomorrow at 3:40pm and arrive on Saturday at 10pm.
Ahhhhhhhhhh take a breath, That's the eastern hemisphere your breathing in.
Take a shower at the hotel and then get out to catch the legendary Byzantium nightlife. Fuck it buy some drugs!! You are gonna love Turkey for the weekend. Force yourself to sleep for 6 hours Sunday morning and then spend all day Sunday freaked out and having a delusional time on a rental scooter. Party thru till Monday when your flight leaves at 10:45am. You can sleep on the plane. Just pin a note to yourself, so someone can help you catch your connection in Egypt. You'll get back in LA at 6:50pm with just enough time to only be about 10 hours late to work.

Broadway blvd fun.

Start on 9th street and head north.

I found an Arcade, a great place to buy meth and heroin. Purchase at your own peril. I prefer to just play some video games. Raiden II stole my quarter.

Then keep trucking north and you'll see tons of supercheap places to buy electronics and workboots.

Then stop in for lunch at Cliftons Cafeteria.

I was also chased half a block by a guy in a wheelchair.

Thursday Art Walk - Stay focused

Starts at Noon. Goes until 9pm. Get your lazy butt out of the Financial District and make your way over to the Art District. Click on this link for more info.

http://www.Downtownartwalk.com

You can also check out the book readings at ALOUD: Tonight is:

Dr. Craig Venter
A Life Decoded
"In conversation with Dr. Michael W. Quick, Professor of Biological Sciences at USC
A riveting account of the unparalleled drama of the quest for the human genome by the scientist who went on to be the first to read and interpret his own genome."

Also: There are still tickets for the Maroon 5 concert. They've been clocked around $65. Section 105.

Lakers Vs. Hornets.

Game starts at 7:30 and check in is at 3. Come on down and get a room for the night. Rooms start at $225.

Tix for the game have been clocked at $240 bucks for section 101 row 8. Half Court. Not bad.

Wear your favorite stuff and get so excited that you have to vomit. Now you're ready to go. Those Lakers are fun to watch. Will Jack be there? I don't know, you could possibly be 8 rows behind him if your the lucky ticketmaster.

What the fuck with the ticketmaster monopoly anyway? Is it just me. Should I shut up? Does ticketmaster have people to break my legs?!? Ouch. Okay, whatever, ticketmaster is cool.

So yea.

Love it or leave it.

Oh god its Monday

Rent a limo and go to Las Vegas for the day. Come down to the front desk and talk to me. I just rented these other cats a limo to Vegas, So why not you. I love it, you love it. We have so much in common. Oh I wish I could go, but I'm sure you'll have fun without me.
Okay, so sex, drugs, drinking, and smoking in the car on the way to Vegas. It's worth $2000. Sure it is. Then when you get to Vegas: Gamble your Brains out at the Dirty Hot Hotel Las Vegas!!! Whooooooooooooooooooooo. Wait a sec. We havn't built it yet, so just pick anyplace (Hint: the Tropicana has the most beautiful pool.)
Leave Vegas around 5pm and get back into Downtown Los Angeles just in time for Mustache Mondays at the Crash Mansion. It's on Grand and Olympic. Remember when it was the Shark Club in '94 and you took too many drugs; so we stayed for 3 days. Do you remember?

Mustache Mondays: Uber hottie-ville with all your gay friends 10pm-2am

Sunday Football. Redskins vs. Jets

Come on Jason Campbell. Lets get that running game going. If you lose, I'm gonna become a cowboys fan. They brought the running game and so much more. They ran for 296 yards. Portis ran for 196. They barely won this squeeker in OT. They even lost the coin. In the end Suisham made the kick from something like 46 yards, with a final score of 23-20 Redskins. That improves their record to 5-3. What a game.

USC football

Well. Well. Well. You're drunk again. Don't be so hard on yourself. Every team has to lose some time. I know you gave me a charlie horse last time I said that, but it's true. Stop thinking about rankings for oncea and just enjoy your homecoming. Alright. Call a taxi service and put some clothes on. You can just catch one at the cab stand if you're staying in the hotel. If not, you should be. Come on down, we've got rooms starting at $225.

So where were we...okay, you're dressed now and it's time to go to your homecoming at the Colosseum. It's just south of Downtown. Take a cab. You're just gonna get drunker at the game. If you leave now, you can listen to the game on the radio and easily make it by the 2nd half. It's only a five minute drive. You might even make the 1st half. The score is still 0-0.

After the game, come back to the hotel and take a nap for crying out loud.

It's Friday?!?

Yes. We all know that you partied too hard on Wednesday night, the ecstasy probably just wore off. Hmmmmmmmmmm. What are you going to do tonight???

Well, start drinking. Buy yourself a six pack and pound half of em and then start drunk dialing some good old friends from highschool and make up incredible lies about yourself. You bought a house before the boom in 1999 and you've married a prince/princess of Madagascar. Then head over to Chinatown and catch SK 87 at the Mountain Bar. Should be fun.

Whatever. Make it interesting.

After you finish that six pack you can head on over to the Staples center and root for the Clippers vs. The Golden State Warriors. Let's all embrace the other Los Angeles Basketball team.

The Day After Halloween

Don't get fired.
Pamper yourself.
Order some hookers to your room/apt/loft/house and just pay them for a massage. There is no need to worry about the happy ending with these dirty whores. Be sure to wear a condom or have your hooker wear one if you want to get really dirty dirty; whatever your gender may be. Some plastic wrap can also be very exciting, but nothing beats a condom, so just wear it.


Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

What else. At 8:30 you can make your way over to the Redcat theater to catch Sandeep Bhagwati and get into it man. Tickets cost around $25 dollars for general admission and Students get $5 off.

Love it or leave it.